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Ragazzi, la direzione del personale della mia azienda oggi ha fatto girare questa circolare tra tutti i dipendenti. E’ scritta in inglese perche’ tutti possano capire. Guardate un po’ cosa ci ricordano…
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MEMO to all the Staff:
It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our
establishment in Milan that offensive language is commonly used by our
Italian speaking staff. Such behaviour, in addition to violating our
policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and
staff. All personnel will immediately adhere to the following rules:
1. Words like cazzo, porca puttana or mi sono rotto il cazzo and other
such expressions will not be tolerated or used for emphasis or
dramatic effect, no matter how heated a discussion may become.
2. You will not say ha fatto una cazzata when someone makes a mistake,
or se lo stanno inculando if you see someone being reprimended, or che
stronzata when a major mistake has been made. All forms and
derivations of the verb cagare are utterly inappropriate and
unacceptable in our environment.
3. No project manager, section head or administrator under any
circumstances will be referred as figlio di puttana, coglione, testa
di cazzo.
4. Lack of determination will not be referred to as mancanza di palle
nor will persons who lack initiative be referred to as bradipo or
cagone.
5. Unusual or creative ideas offered by the management are not to be
referred as cagate mentali or idee del cazzo.
6. Do not say come rompe le palle nor ha rotto i coglioni if a person
is persistent; do not add gli fa ancora male il culo if a colleague is
going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, you must not say
siamo nella merda (refer to item # 2) nor ci hanno aperti when a
matter becomes excessively complicated.
7. When asking a someone to leave you alone,you must not say vattene
affanculo nor should you ever substitute May I help you? With che
cazzo vuoi?
8. Under no circumstances should you ever call your elderly industrial
partners vecchi stronzi.
9. Do not say me ne sbatto when a relevant project is presented to
you, nor should you ever answer ciucciami il cazzo when your
assistance is required.
10. You should never call partners as frocio or mignotta; the sexual
behavior of our staff is not to be discussed in terms such as
culattone or bagascia.
11. Last but not least, after reading a note please don’t say mi ci
pulisco il culo. Just keep it clean and dispose of it properly.
Thank you. Regards.
Digiu
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